8Care Pairs

8.1 Principles

8.1.1 Every Mohist is paired with one other Mohist in a 兼爱结对 care pair. The care pair is the smallest unit of impartial care: before you can care for everyone, make sure there is one person you actually look after, and one person who actually looks after you.

8.1.2 Pairs are arranged by the care coordinator and deliberately cross lines of family, age, and background. You are not paired with a spouse, parent, child, or housemate, and the coordinator avoids keeping two people of the same occupation or age group together for long. (Test: results — pairs across lines make people see needs they could not see before.)

8.1.3 A care pair runs both ways. The two people are partners; there is no carer and no cared-for.

8.1.4 A care pair is not supervision. Your partner does not report what you say or do to the chapter lead, and does not make requests of you on the chapter's behalf.

8.2 Contact

8.2.1 Care partners are in contact at least once a week, by any means: in person, phone, voice, or text. Any content counts; "how was your week?" is enough.

8.2.2 Partners should meet in person, or by video call, at least once a month. Seeing each other at the weekly meeting counts.

8.2.3 At the end of each quarter, the two do a short check-in: how the contact has been, and whether either needs help with anything. Either partner records the date and the kind of check-in (in person / call / text) in the member app. The content is not recorded.

8.2.4 The annual Three Tests self-review (chapter 3, 3.2.3) is done with your partner, usually at the fourth-quarter check-in.

8.3 Rotation

8.3.1 Pairs rotate every quarter, announced by the care coordinator at the first monthly meeting of the quarter. Rotation means every Mohist comes to know a dozen or so people over three years, and keeps pairs from becoming closed circles.

8.3.2 A pair may be extended for one quarter when circumstances call for it: one partner is ill, bereaved, or otherwise in difficulty, and the other knows the situation and is willing to continue. Either partner asks the coordinator; a pair may be extended at most twice in a row.

8.3.3 Either partner may ask for a change of partner without giving a reason. The coordinator arranges it within 14 days and does not pass anything on to the other partner.

8.3.4 A new Mohist is paired on the day of admission without waiting for the quarterly rotation. The coordinator keeps a Mohist ready who is willing to take a new partner mid-quarter.

8.4 The pair and the fund

8.4.1 The care pair is the first layer of a chapter's support. When you are in difficulty, tell your partner first; what can be solved between the two of you is solved there.

8.4.2 What your partner cannot solve, your partner brings with you to the care coordinator or chapter lead, so that the Care Fund can be used under chapter 9. Your partner comes along so that you do not have to ask alone.

8.4.3 Partners may lend money, lend a hand, or mind each other's children; that is impartial care and needs no report. For larger sums, use the fund instead, so that the pair is not strained.

8.5 Confidentiality

8.5.1 What passes between care partners is confidential. What you tell your partner, your partner tells no one — including the chapter lead and the coordinator.

8.5.2 There are three exceptions: you may harm yourself; you may harm someone else; a minor is being harmed. In those cases your partner passes the necessary information to someone who can help — usually the care coordinator, or in an emergency the local emergency or crisis line — and tells you first where possible.

8.5.3 The check-in record holds only the date and the kind of contact. The coordinator, the chapter lead, the region, and the Council cannot see the content of a conversation, because it is not stored anywhere.

8.5.4 If a partner breaks confidentiality, you may raise it with the care coordinator or chapter lead under chapter 14.

8.6 Youth Mohists

8.6.1 A youth Mohist is paired with another youth Mohist, and one adult Mohist is the shared contact for both. The adult must not be related to either family and must have met the youth protection requirements of chapter 11.

8.6.2 The contact rules for youth pairs are the same as for adults. The adult contact is in touch with each of the two young people once a month, with a parent present if they wish.

8.6.3 Confidentiality under 8.5 applies between youth partners, except that in the situations in 8.5.2 the adult contact must inform the guardian.

8.7 Asking for help

8.7.1 When you need help, say so to your partner. You do not have to wait until things are serious, and you do not have to prove you "deserve" help.

8.7.2 If your partner is away or unavailable, contact the care coordinator or chapter lead directly. Both are listed in the member app.

8.7.3 If you do not know what help you need, it is enough to say "this week has not been good." Your partner's job is to listen first.

8.8 When a partner goes quiet

8.8.1 If your partner has not answered any contact for seven days, try another way: a different channel, or a Mohist you both know.

8.8.2 If there is still no answer at 14 days, tell the care coordinator. The coordinator uses the other contact details the chapter holds, including the emergency contact, to confirm the partner is safe.

8.8.3 Once safety is confirmed, the coordinator decides whether the pair needs changing. Going quiet is not a fault; it may be illness, a crisis, or simple neglect. When contact resumes, no one asks why.

8.8.4 If a Mohist has missed the quarterly check-in two quarters running, the coordinator has one conversation with them: whether the care pair suits them, and whether the way of keeping contact needs to change. (Test: evidence)